Thoughts on the passing of a Father

“Every father should remember that one day his son will follow his example instead of his advice.”

Mr. Charlie Maxwell died Saturday November 24th. He was in my estimation the only Father I knew that had a truly remarkable relationship with one of his son --- my friend and “brother” Bob Maxwell.

I’ve known Bob since 1973 when I met him and his wife Marcia at a trade show in Nashville, Tenn. In those days they ran Sportsman’s One Stop at the entrance to Land Between The Lakes where I worked. Over the subsequent 35 years I got to know Bob and all his family and refer to him as a truly a “brother I never had.”

Bob and Marcia’s daughters treat us like aunts and uncles and Mr. Charlie, well Mr. Charlie always treated me like just a part of his extended family. Yet, I digress from the point I wish to make.

Charlie Maxwell was a member of this country’s “Greatest Generation.” While others of his age went to war, it was people like Mr. Charlie that helped develop and deploy the atomic bomb in Oak Ridge, Tenn., which brought the war to closure.

As an instrument technician, Mr. Charlie became widely known in the circles for his work and was affiliated for 50-years with his instrument and controls professional society. In fact, the people at Oak Ridge National Laboratory, where I worked from 1990 thru 1994 remembered Mr. Charlie as much for his easy-going Southern manners as his expertise.

There are some people you meet in your life that just by being around them you gain much insight and knowledge. Mr. Charlie was such a person. He was one of those unique Fathers in my estimation that was easy to be with and understood that children learn through example. He was a teacher in the best sense of the word and simply by knowing him I learned much by watching him live his life.

Charlie Maxwell was one of those unique people who was spiritual not by dogma but by living. His church was the woods and fields. His passions were hunting and fishing and golf for that matter. He was as comfortable communion with his God and Nature on the lakes as he was in the woods in a deer or turkey blind. At 90-years old he was still hunting and taking turkey and deer.

Never one to give up, a valuable and honored trait of the Greatest Generation, Mr. Charlie was diagnosed 18-years ago with pancreatic cancer and for all practical purposes should have left us almost two decades ago. Not so with Mr. Charlie.

Always a strong fighter for what he wanted and believed in as evidenced by his “holding his on” until Bob and Marcia celebrated their 40th anniversary this past October, he defied all odds and gave us a gift of his presence until this past weekend.

Charlie Maxwell I believe was equally a unique person when it came to the relationship with his son Bob. Of this relationship, I must confess, I was envious.

Bob and Mr. Charlie genuinely enjoyed being around one another and doing things together whether that was hunting, fishing, fixing something or just breaking bread and having a good meal. Now as one who never had such a relationship with their Father that was special in my eyes. It is a memory from the deer camp days and an image that I will always cherish. Bob and Mr. Charlie can be proud of such a relationship since it is truly uncommon in today’s society.

Mr. Maxwell always had a firm handshake and a smile for me. He was always soft-spoken and made you feel comfortable. I already miss that.

And when I think of his life and what I knew of it, I believe that the words from a Jimmy Buffett song most appropriately describes the life of Mr. Charlie: Some of life was magic, some of life was tragic, but I had a good life always.

Rest in peace Mr. Charlie and May God bless all your family as they deal with the loss of such a dear person.

Until next time.

Dr. Darryl
L. Darryl Armstrong
ARMSTRONG and Associates